another fucking walmart

They're building another Walmart in my neighborhood. I'm contemplating a protest.

Super. As if we really need another Walmart. As if we really need another crowded, chaotic, everyday low price corporate-whore megastore, located about 3 miles away from the other megastore hell-hole. Dammit people, can't you see that this is not cost effective?!

The guys from Southpark were right, Walmart is taking over the world. Soon they'll be springing up on every corner. Not quite as bad as Starbucks, but close. I've tried discouraging my peeps from going to Walmart, but they just won't listen. It's too damn cheap. That's where they hook you. If I have to pay a little bit more to inhibit aiding a corporation that's somewhat on the verge of a monopoly, then by george, I'll do it. Some causes are worth spending for. Another one of the draws to Walmart is that they have everything and I mean everything, from tampons to tires. That's where they suck you in. The minds behind Walmart knew exactly what they were doing. People don't have time or money. Let's create a super store with, what seems to be by American standards, insanely low prices. Let's also sell everything; from clothes to houseware, jewelry to photoprocessing, food, cosmetics, hell even auto-maintenance. The masses won't ever buy anywhere else again. We'll drive out all others. They will come to us, over and over....forever! Mwaaaahhh haaaaaa haaaa!!

If there's anything more tortureous than going to Walmart than it would probably be working there. I really feel sorry for the people that work at Walmart. That has to be one of the most miserable places to work. I heard that during the hiring and training process for new employees at Walmart, they show you a video about how unions "are bad". Hmm. That doesn't seem ethical to me. Believe me, I know about lack of ethics. I worked at The Home Depot, which is one of the shittiest jobs I ever had, besides Macy's. The dread that I experienced every time I went into work was nearly vomit inducing. But man, going in to work at Walmart every day, that takes some kind of divine inner strength. That or a complete and utter disconnection of emotion and pain. You would have to get there and find a parking space in that zoo of a parking lot...shopping carts strewn all over the place. Then you get to go your register and put on that smock and stand at a register and ring up a bunch of assholes all day. Maybe if you're lucky you can work in a department. OOhh. A department, where people expect you to know everything about anything and where you can't even walk to the bathroom because people are attacking you like a pack of hungry jackals, demanding that you help them. Mmm. Sounds fantastic. Where do I sign up?

It's really a shame that Walmart is so evil. For my birthday I got this lunch box that I loved, it was yellow with a smiley face on it. Ironically, it was from Walmart, and I knew this because the person that bought it for me left the receipt in the bag. Not too smooth. Anyhow despite all that I loved that damn lunch box, but then I lost it. I forgot it in one of my night classes and the janitors must have stolen it because it wasn't there the next day. I'm still pretty bitter. I want to replace it, but I'm too proud to go to Walmart. Why should I pump more money into that business? They don't need it. Then again, it's just one lunch box. Look at me, I'm starting to buckle already. They've gotten to me too. I don't know how long I can resist the temptation. I can hear the Walmart calling to me, like a trio of sirens, singing it's enchanting tune of low low prices and shiny yellow lunch boxes. It's a tune that sounds far too sweet.

I mean, it wouldn't hurt to just buy one more item from them right? I don't really shop there anyway. Just the lunch box and that's it. No more.

Listen to me, I sound like a crack fiend looking for that one last fix. This is what Walmart has done to me. And this is what it will do to you too, if you're not careful. Don't let that little yellow smiley face fool you. Not everything that glitters is gold.